I'm very thankful that I married the woman I married. We've made each other laugh nearly every day of our marriage, and we've never had a "fight" (although we don't always agree with one another). For us, the "hard part" about marriage hasn't really been that hard. When I read and hear the stats about how often marriages fail, I grow increasingly grateful for my marriage. While I'm certainly no expert on marriage (10 years is still in the honeymoon phase, I suppose), I think I've learned a couple of secrets to making a marriage successful.
- The Lord should be at the forefront of the marriage. Although my wife and I didn't learn this until several years into our marriage, it's a timeless truth that goes a long way to keeping a marriage "right".
- There is no place for selfishness in a marriage. When it comes right down to it, the reason every marriage that has ever failed has failed is because of selfishness - from one or both partners. That selfishness may manifest itself in the areas of finances, infidelity, time, or any number of other things, but the fact is that every failed marriage is the result of one or both marriage partners putting their selfish desires ahead of the needs of their spouse.
- The husband and wife compose the core family unit. Too often, marriages begin falling apart once kids are introduced into the mix. Why? Well, the focus begins to be on the kids rather than the spouse. A family is as strong (and as weak) as the marriage that provides the core to that family. If the husband and/or wife begin to put all their energies into the children to the neglect of the spouse, they've started down a dangerous path.
I hesitate to say much more than this. As a man who has only been married for 10 years, I'm still a relative newcomer to the world of marriage. Besides, my wife just called me to come eat supper....